The Only Hero is You
by Iggymonster
Summary: When there's nothing left, sometimes it's best to escape to a fictional world. But what if you're pulled out of there too quickly...USUK. AU, human names, suicidal themes, could get a little too depressing. Rated T for language; subject to change.
1. Prologue  Questions

**A/N: Hey all. An idea for this has been circulating around in my head for a while now and I wished to act upon it. However, I changed the plot around a little and now it's evolved into this.**

**I don't know how long this will be; probably quite long. ~20 chapters or so. I've never really reached that much before.**

**READ: THIS IS JUST THE PROLOGUE. Chapters in future will be much, much longer. This is just to get into the swing of things. Plus, I like prologues before a story. I like to write them because it helps me too. Yes, this is dual narrative, and will most likely be in present tense.**

_**Pairings: **_**Mainly USUK (Arthur/Alfred) and AmeBela (Alfred/Natalia) at the beginning.**

_**Warnings: **_**There is a lot of suicide references in this; it's what the story revolves around. It might possibly get a bit depressing too but I haven't decided yet. Basically, Arthur's lingering on the brink of insanity. I thought it'd be cool but a challenge to write, sue me...**

**Actually, no, don't sue me. Hetalia does not and will not ever belong to me. Sadly.**

**Sorry for babbling on! Let us begin.**

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><p><em><strong>The Only Hero is You<strong>__  
>Prologue: Questions<em>

Is the world truly as magical as it seems?

That is the question I ponder to myself every second, every minute, every hour, every day of my life.

What if life was simply a fairy tale and nothing more? It's not always giggles and cheerfulness, though.

I believe in fantasy. I believe in magic. I believe so much in it that it's caused me to view the world from a distorted perspective. My obsession for fictional worlds, for fictional happiness, has caused me to slowly disperse from reality.

Perhaps, maybe, that's a good thing? To not be so afraid, to not be so worried, because you do not live in a real world? In fiction, anything is possible. I am weak, but I could be a strong warrior. I have no purpose, but I could have someone who cares.

All I have to do is dream and there'll be no stopping me.

However...what if that dream slowly but inevitably evaporates into thin air, like smoke falling though the spaces between my fingers. Like water in the sun. What if that dream slowly but surely evolved into something far worse, something much more indescribable? Isn't the world elusive in the first place? A mystery we are meant to discover...or, maybe, we are not meant to question it and appreciate it instead.

Some would kill for a life. Oh, how ironic that statement is.

Despite my angst, I feel I am top of the world.

Why? Because I have my dreams.

Yet I've lost my hope. That was drained from me years ago. Will it return? I don't know.

Am I lonely? Am I shouting at brick walls hoping to get an answer but to no avail? Am I screaming at the top of my lungs but nobody can hear me? Am I...trapped? Is God, if he is up there, my captor? Is He enjoying this?

Well, if You are, then I'd like You to know that I'm not amused. I seldom enjoy your petty little games. I do not wish to be Your puppet anymore. I've had enough.

Ahem.

I suppose it'd be rude to not introduce myself.

My name is Arthur. Arthur Kirkland.

Although...that could possibly be incorrect.

_Because I don't even know who I am._

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><p>Is the world as great as they make it out to be?<p>

Of course it is. It just has to be. Why else would I constantly be happy?

There's nothing to be sad about! I'm fine, just fine, I swear on my life.

I don't need to improve on anything. I'm perfect the way I am, just like everybody is! I'm happy, I'm great and my life is just...amazing. There's no other word to describe it.

Well, my thesaurus kinda tells me that 'wonderful', 'incredible', 'terrific' and 'marvellous' could work too, plus some other words I don't know ('astounding'? What's that?), but that's not the point here.

I've got an awesome girlfriend, I've got an awesome job and I'm just awesome all around!

But why do I feel like something is missing?

No, no, I'm fine. I'm alright. On top of the world...

I don't need anything...I don't want anything else because I already have it all...

Is there something I'm not doing properly? God, if You're up there, can You tell me where I'm going wrong?

_I'm fine, though, I'm fine._

You can't fix what's not broken, I guess. So why should I try to improve? I could develop what I already have but still that'd never be enough.

Is it ever enough?

Eurgh, it's way too early in the morning to be getting all phil...philo...gah, whatever, it's too early to overwork my brain. It could heat up and explode or something.

Um...I guess I should probably introduce myself...

Hi, I'm Alfred F. Jones, I'm 19 years old and I'm happy!

...I think. I seriously hope.

See, I'm all smiles! All laughs! All hopes!

But maybe I'm lying.

_Who am I? Am I telling the truth?_

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><p><strong>AN: I hope this prologue was alright.**

**I wish to update with the first official chapter sometime in the near future. I want to get it done before next week. Why? Because I need to update faster. I truly have no excuse.**

**Feel free to leave /constructive/criticism, also I'd be very grateful if you can offer advice and/or ideas for it, since I'm practically stumped thanks to the sudden plot modifications. Initially, it was Alfred that was going to wish to end it all...**

**Ahem. I've said too much. I hope to see you soon.**

**Hasta la Pasta~!**


	2. One: Doubts  Arthur

**A/N: Thank you for the feedback so far, guys. That includes reviews, putting this on story alert and adding it to your favourites. I really appreciate it! **

**I have decided what I'm going to do with chapters now, so disregard that last A/N. Basically, every chapter will be told from one view point (unless there's a reason why there should be two) and thus chapters will range from long to short. This could mean there'd be a lot more than 20 chapters like I said...**

**Ceena936: Aww, I'm honoured! This made my day! Thank you~**

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><p><em><strong>The Only Hero is You<br>**__Chapter One: Doubts_

Arthur

I stare longingly out the café window and watch as the snowflakes delicately fall to the ground, covering the street in a blanket of snow. I put my hand onto the glass subconsciously and the corners of my mouth rise, turning into an expression that vaguely resembles a smile.

I watch as a gaggle of children build a snowman across the street. Even from here, I can see that they are laughing, giggling, smiling, having all the fun in the world. They're carefree; they don't have to deal with the outside world just yet. They see the world through a fun, young perspective. They're as optimistic as can be; the glass is half full to them.

I sigh. I wish I could be like them. I wish I could be back in my own refuge, my own sanctuary, instead of here. It's been so long since I was last outside and at least making an effort to socialise, to belong in the real word. It doesn't feel refreshing at all, although I know it should. It's barely passable. I wear a mask and I hide behind a facade – I look happy, don't I? Inside, I feel dead.

The feelings inside are insufferable, hard to bear, and I wear them like a locket that is too tight and suffocating me. All of me.

I rest my hands on the cup of tea I have in front of me, not caring that it's still hot and burning my hands. I don't care that it may blister. The physical pain it is bringing me does not compare to the internal pain within. On the outside, I am numb, motionless, appearing like a robot. On the inside, it is too complicated for words.

Even if I know the directions, I still feel lost. Even if I am smiling and my eyes may be sparkling, I am far from happy. It's a long, winding road I'm getting bored of. I cannot walk anymore.

I'm too numb. My legs are numb.

If life is a journey, where is the destination? Death?

I do not wish to dwell on such a thing, because I'm fine now. I recovered, didn't I? They helped me and they showed me that it's not so bad and it does get better, didn't they?

I sigh once again, exasperated. I rest my head in my now scarlet hands and close my eyes, hoping I am able to drift away. I haven't forgotten how to enter my mythical world, have I? I would be very disappointed if I have.

I don't want to live in this world anymore. I want to live in a fantasy, full of magic, full of unicorns, full of creatures unknown on Earth. I can be free, I can be happy. Nothing can bother me there.

Suddenly, I feel a tap on my shoulder. It shocks me like electricity and I almost jump straight out of my skin. With my head still in my hands, I turn and look up. I can see a figure standing over me. It is a person, regrettably, no younger than me and he is smiling. I'm envious already! I do not wish to speak to this young man.

"Hey...dude, are you okay?" he asks me, his sapphire eyes sparkling with curiosity. His accent is undoubtedly an American one, which is odd – I am affirmative that I live in London. "You look kinda lonely and down."

I scoff. That's not even half of the emotions swimming through my veins. However, how do I express that? Through facial expressions, through body gestures, through words? Either way, it's a very difficult procedure. I do not know this man. What is his name, what is his story, why is he here?

Why does he care for me? More importantly, why should he?

"It is nice of you to be concerned," I smile politely at him, hoping he wouldn't think of me as unapproachable. It wouldn't be the first time someone has thought that about me, however. "But I assure you that I am fine. I am...tired, that is all. Thank you, anyway."

He raises a skeptical eyebrow. I can tell he does not believe me. I don't blame him, it is fairly obvious that I'm lying. I may not be a thespian, but I am wearing a mask. I may not act for a living, but I do pretend to be alright.

"Um...alright," he replies after a short while. That curious spark in his eyes has vanished and has been replaced with doubt and uncertainty instead. He shoots me an incredulous look before reluctantly turning away. I watch him silently as he returns to his table before returning to dreaming and dazing out of the window.

Maybe if I dream hard enough and maybe if I have faith, I can be like those children. I can be like that lad who approached me. I can be the dreaded 'h' word.

You can do anything if you try. Absolutely anything. That's what they told me.

But I do not believe them.

I never believed them.

I sip my tea, which is rapidly cooling down, and keep my gaze on the empty seat opposite. How delightful it would be if that seat was filled! I could interact with another human; maybe they could be a significant other if I truly trusted them. How wondrous it would be!

As wonderful and sublime as it may seem, it is still miles away from here. How far is near, anyway? It is not in my sights, it is in the distance. I cannot reach out and grab it. I can dream. That's all I can ever do. Dream – my solution to everything. That's all I need. Dreams, imagination...

The Beatles were wrong. I'll get by with a little help from my imagination, not my friends. I don't need friends! I am fine with isolation. I am content with the solitude I have willingly brought upon myself, and I am content with the walls I single handily built by myself. They are made of an indestructible material that nobody can break down. There are no doors – you cannot enter. My heart has a padlock on it and only I have the key. Only I have it, nobody else.

The true me is the me no one will be allowed to witness at any time.

I promised myself to not grow attached to anyone. It is not worth the heartbreak.

Through the corner of my eye, I watch the American again. I am intrigued by him for some reason I cannot seem to fathom. I don't even know his name, why is he so fascinating? Is it the way he moves, is it his composure? His demeanour, his happy-go-lucky attitude? Maybe it is my jealousy getting the better of me.

I look down disappointedly at my empty cup and leave it on the table for the cleaning staff to take and wash up. Lazy? Probably. But that is their job, is it not?

Without thinking, I find myself walking over to the boy. Tentatively I tap him on the shoulder as his back is to me and I wait awkwardly as he turns around. He looks surprised at first, but soon smiles. I have no choice but to fake a smile back.

"Oh...you again," he sounds less than happy to see me, but nevertheless greets me. Upon closer inspection, it appears to me that he works here.

"Hello," I greet him. Feigning stupidity, I ask him, "Are you a member of staff?"

His smile transforms almost immediately into a grin. "I sure do! You need any help?"

"No, thank you," I tell him bluntly. I need an excuse to talk to him. "I am just here to inform you that I have finished my tea and I shall be leaving. It was lovely, by the way."

He nods as I speak, I noticed.

"Alright, dude!" his voice obnoxiously rises by a few decibels. He truly is American! "I'll clear it up. And thanks! You alright?"

"Better," I lie. I don't feel any better if I'm honest. "It'll be a while before I can truly classify myself as 'alright'."

He looks bemused. Maybe it's because I am so formal, and he is not? I am so eloquent, and he is so casual. I feel as if we are parallel and getting along would be like mixing chocolate with chilli. It just does not and will never work.

"That sucks. Want me to cheer you up?" his smile that seems to be permanently plastered on his face has dropped slightly. His tone is sympathetic somehow.

I sigh and my sad smile mirrors his perfectly. I rest one hand on his shoulder.

"Mate, that may prove to be quite a difficulty," I inform him. He tilts his head to the side like a dog. I can tell that he is lost in this conversation.

"Why?" he questions. Well, why not? Must every action have an explanation behind it?

"It is a very complicated story," I warn him. Truth is, I am not ready to tell anybody just yet. I do not know this man. I do not even know myself.

I know it is a common excuse, but it's how I truly feel. I'm too inept to tell him that, though, and I may end up resisting. With eyes like his, it is hard to not give in and surrender.

Thankfully, he respects this. "Alright. The name's Alfred, in case you were wondering."

What a mind reader! Of course, I am not going to admit that I was wondering.

"Hello, Alfred," I greet him, still trying to keep this forced smile on my face. I have a fear it may soon fall off. It does not have a reason to be there. "I suppose I should tell you my name. I am Arthur, it is a pleasure to meet you."

"You too," he answers, his smile suddenly returning and reaching his ears. "Hi, Arthur."

I can feel the atmosphere surrounding us turn awkward almost instantly as I do not know how to continue the conversation. I clear my throat to at least break some of the silence.

Although even the silence is loud, and I can never seem to fit a word in edgeways.

"So, you gonna be back here tomorrow?" he inquires, his intrusive sparkle and tone gradually creeping back. "Since you love the tea you had and all."

"I hope so," I tell him, although I am sure that is just a lie too. Not certain, but it is a high probability. With me, I have lied so compulsively that I do not know when I am telling the truth or just spewing poppycock again.

"See ya then."

He turns his back to me, evidently ending the conversation. I walk away and out the door, suddenly hit by a wave of ice. I hug myself to keep warm; my coat is simply not enough. As warm and large as it may be, it just isn't enough.

_See ya then._

Oh, Alfred, how oblivious you are! Ignorance truly is bliss.

Why do I say that?

Because I may choose to end it all.

I was pulled out of my world too quickly. I cannot return. There's a chance that I can try, but it's fat.

Why, oh why, did I seek help? I did not need it! I was happy, wasn't I? The sound of my screams and tears would be my wakeup call almost every morning, but that doesn't mean anything, does it?

I'm pulling the plug.

I just cannot do this anymore.

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><p><strong>AN: ;n;**

**Next chapter shall be Alfred's views on all of this, plus a little update here on poor Artie. **

**I really like writing depressing things about suicide for some reason. It's kinda creepy if you ask me...they just seem to be right in my comfort zone.**

**Just a little piece of trivia: I have based most of this chapter, if not the whole story, on the song **_**Imaginary **_**by Evanescence, and Arthur preferring to be in his own little world is based on a character called Lynette in a book we read in English. I quite like what the author did with her and I want to use some aspects in Arthur, since I can see a lot of her in him (or him in her...wait, that sounds kinda pervy.)**

**Ahem! I am drawing this chapter to a close. Please feel free to review, add to favourites, alert or drop me a line and chat. I'm not forcing you to (okaymaybeIam OTL), but it'd be lovely if you do. I'd be happy, very happy~**

**Thank you! Iggymonster/Tiaah out.**

**Hasta la Pasta~!**


	3. Two: Falling Alfred

**A/N: Thanks everyone so far. –gives love-**

**Oh boy, this is gonna be a struggle. I tend to digress and waffle on a bit, plus I love writing with bigger words and more...structure, I suppose. More prose, more detail. Writing Alfred is gonna be so difficult for someone like me! Alas, I'll give it my best shot, but I can't guarantee it'll work.**

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><p><em><strong>The Only Hero is You<br>**__Chapter Two: Falling_

Alfred

Sigh...it's so damn freezing today.

Waking up today was, oh God, I can't even begin to describe it. Awful? A misery? Extremely difficult? Yeah, those all seem pretty accurate. My bed was just so warm and cosy and then I had to get up and leave it! In the early hours of the morning on top of that!

Ugh. Life is so hard.

My alarm didn't even go off at the right damn time either, so I was totally late. The boss gave me this boring lecture but in all honesty I didn't listen. I just kinda rolled my eyes, ignored his words and just did my job like I'm supposed to. You know, because I'm at work.

It's a slow day today.

Must be because of the snow.

I think some roads have been closed. It's pretty stupid if you ask me. The snow isn't even that thick. It's barely four inches! Back in the best country ever (America obviously, where my heart will forever lie) the snow could reach incredible limits like, I don't know, five hundred thousand inches.

Okay, maybe that's an exaggeration, but winter in London just isn't as great as winter as in, say, New York. Now that's a real winter!

Although, it's pretty darn cold when it wants to be. So I prefer Florida, because it's hot and super awesome there.

But...I'm losing focus here. I need to get back on topic.

Anyway, around noon this guy walks in and I watch him pretty closely as he makes his way to a table.

He looks really sad, but I'm not allowed to get too close with customers.

Haha, that sounds like I'm about to hook up with him or something weird like that. Besides, I've got a girlfriend and I love her!

...That statement is debatable, by the way.

Oh God, I hope she never hears that. It'd be the death of me and I quite like living.

Behind the counter, I watch with my hand resting on my face as he appears to be lost in his own little world. I think he could possibly be a bit delusional. A bit ... not right in the head.

Wait, I don't even know this guy. So why am I so interested in him?

He just looks really lonely and down. Maybe he's just super depressed, or maybe it's me going crazy? Maybe he's alright, just neutral.

Maybe he's cold.

All the possibilities begin to float around my head. They're making me feel kinda dizzy but, for some reason, I can't seem to take my eyes off of him.

Without thinking, I lose control of my limbs and begin walking over to him. What am I doing?

Alfred, stop now.

_Stop._

Alfred, don't get your nose in other people's business...this is why people hate you...

No, people don't hate me. Unless...they do.

I shake my head slightly and I still haven't stopped walking. Suddenly, I stop, since there's a large obstacle in my way. Oh wait, that's the table.

I let out a sigh and take a deep breath before tapping this guy on the shoulder. That snaps him out of his crazy little world and I laugh internally as his whole body jolts.

Aww...I must have scared him.

Wait, that's not cute. What if he had a heart attack and, like, died or something?

Ahem.

"Hey...dude, are you okay?" I ask meekly. I think. My voice is quieter than usual, anyway. Which, according to most people, is still pretty loud. Well then. "You look kinda lonely and down."

He looks up at me for a few moments and in those moments I feel pretty stupid. Is he going to reply? Maybe he's so lost in his own world that...

"It is nice of you to be concerned," he replies with a polite smile. It looks fake and forced. "But I assure you that I am fine. I am...tired, that is all. Thank you, anyway."

Oh, tired. Right.

That explains things, I guess. Or maybe he's playing me for a fool and making up an excuse? He sounded pretty reluctant about it.

Meh, I don't know. I raise an eyebrow, not sure if I believe him. I probably don't but hey, I'm not too in touch with my feelings. I think. What does that even mean?

Someone told me, then I kinda forgot. Kinda.

"Um...alright," I forgot to reply, whoops. So we were kinda there looking at each other silently. I don't know why but I was inspecting him pretty closely. For a guy, he's pretty handsome. Okay, now I'm just sounding weird.

Shut up, Alfred, while you still can.

I zip my lips shut and hesitantly turn away. I give him one last look to check if he was still alright before blocking him entirely.

I've got work to carry on with, anyway. Even if today has been extremely slow and boring. Ugh...so bored. That may become the highlight of my day, sadly enough.

Some more moments pass and my boredom hasn't faded. I've tried to think of something and I tried to suggest my ideas to my boss but he said they were illegal and would most likely get me killed. Or even fired.

Dammit.

All of a sudden, I feel someone shyly tap on my shoulder. Well, it's more like fingertips softly brushing against the fabric of my clothes.

I turn around out of shock and when I realise who touched me is, I loosen up and smile.

It's that guy again. The guy with blonde spiky hair and green eyes that are actually kinda mesmerising. No, shut up, Alfred, shut up, shut up, shut up!

"Oh...you again," I tell him. Shit, that sounded really rude. I didn't mean for it to be, honestly. I'm just so bored and irritated. But, that's not an excuse...is it?

It should be.

"Hello," he greets me, so much politer than me. "Are you a member of staff?"

I drop the rudeness and grin. "I sure do! You need any help?"

"No, thank you," he laughs awkwardly. "I am just here to inform you that I have finished my tea and I shall be leaving. It was lovely, by the way."

As he speaks, I nod, because my boss told me that's how I be polite to people. Eh, seems to be working, I guess. It makes me look like I'm listening and I care.

"Alright, dude! I'll clear it up. And thanks! You alright?"

"Better," he shrugs. His tone of voice sounds incredibly disappointed, but I'm going to take his word for it. The customer is always right. "It'll be a while before I can truly classify myself as 'alright'."

I drop my smile. That's...that's so sad. I actually kinda feel sorry for the poor guy. I want to know what's happened to him, but that'd be rude. I don't want to be nosy.

Although, sometimes, I just...I just can't control it. It's a reflex. Yeah, a reflex.

"That sucks. Want me to cheer you up?" I try to be sympathetic, but it's probably an epic fail. Cheering people up; it's never been my forte.

Suddenly, he places one hand on my shoulder, and I flush at the contact. I'm not blushing; it just felt like all the blood kinda rushed through my body all at once. It was a weird and strange feeling to be honest.

"Mate, that may prove to be quite a difficulty," he tells me, his British accent (which is kinda cu- I mean, awesome) really shining through. I tilt my head in confusion.

"Why?" I ask. I'm probably being a pest. It'd be best to stop right now, but I'm not gonna. It'd take a lot to shut me up.

"It is a very complicated story," he tells me.

I want him to go into detail.

I want him to tell me every aspect of this 'very complicated story'.

I want to find out how to comfort him.

Of course, I'd never admit that.

I sigh.

"Alright. The name's Alfred, in case you were wondering," I tell him. It's pretty pointless, I know. He wasn't wondering, I bet.

"Hello, Alfred," he greets me. That uncomfortable smile he's wearing is still there. God, I wish he'd save himself the pain and stress and just drop it already. "I suppose I should tell you my name. I am Arthur, it is a pleasure to meet you."

"You too," I smile at him. "Hi, Arthur."

Silence.

It's incredibly awkward.

I decide to break it, since I'm assuming he has absolutely no idea about how to continue the conversation.

"So, you gonna be back here tomorrow? Since you love the tea you had and all."

"I hope so," he answers.

I can't tell if he sounds happy or sad. He's a good actor, I'll give him that.

"See ya then."

I turn my back to him, wanting him to leave already.

He just...he just looks so sad. Misery really does love company.

I'm starting to feel the sadness. He's rubbing off on me.

Uh, not literally, though.

He's gone in a matter of seconds.

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><p><em>A young man from London has been found this morning in his home after reportedly attempting to kill himself.<em>

_The man is believed to be Mr. Arthur Kirkland, 23, who had been allegedly been suffering from a strong case of depression. _

_Police has confirmed that the young man was found still breathing, but he is currently in hospital. It has not been confirmed if he will survive or not._

_More on this story inside._

Oh...oh my God...

Arthur...

Is that the Arthur I met only a few days ago?

No, it can't be.

Can it?

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><p><strong>AN: Dun dun dun!**

**This actually took longer to write than it did for Arthur's chapter. Writing in this style is incredibly painful, especially when I want it to be serious, not humorous.**

**Please leave feedback! I spent a lot of time and effort on this, it'd be lovely to know what you think.**

**Feel free to correct me on any mistakes. I have been deprived of sleep lately (that's what having a boyfriend five hours behind you does to you, I've discovered) and I just ... suck. Bleh.**

**Forgive me.**

**Love you 3**

**Iggymonster/Tiaah out! Hasta la Pasta~!**


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